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It’s so hard to try to tell a story, that I’m not even going to try! Instead, here are a few tid-bits of how it all went, in no particular order:

• We left on Thursday, September 3rd. It took us about 3 hours to arrive to our camping spot. Not bad!
• One of the first people we saw at Burning Man was a man in his late 40s, wearing nothing but shoes and a hat. His testicles were dangling around, remarkably stretched. The heat probably was to blame for that.
  At any rate, Kelly was welcomed by cock and balls. We gave the guy a nice and cold beer, and chatted it for a few minutes. It was a great way to start, with a friendly naked guy.
• Our camp, BRCU, was awesome. We had two big domes, one for partying (with our DJ, dance floor and lights) and the other one for chilling out (full of kiddie swimming pools, overflowing with stuffed animals). It was home for a few days, and it really kicked a lot of ass.
• There was a lot dust wind. Of course there’s dust, it’s a dry lake bed. And the dust is a pleasant experience as long as the wind comes and goes, or is a breeze.
  On Friday, Saturday and Sunday, the wind was strong. It was also consistent, starting at around 10am and dying down sometime around 11pm. Ridiculous, crazy and annoying.
  What’s one to do? Well, you can either find shelter, or you can spontaneously dance.
• I’d always heard the myth that there are a lot of orgies at Burning Man. Well, let’s just say that -without participating!- it’s not a myth.
• On a somewhat related note, and once again without being involved in it, I’ve learned about more and more people into polyamory. I guess my upbringing makes it something that would never work for me, but that my open mind makes it acceptable as long as it’s not shoved into my face.
• Our diets consisted of a lot of canned foods, like Spaghettios. All we used was a couple of plastic spoons, and not even half of a very small camping propane tank.
• The one thing I enjoyed the most this year is easy for me to decide on, and probably easy for you to guess: having Kelly with me.
  We spent most of our time together, sharing our experiences and caring for each other. Every single moment worth remembering involves her as an integral part of that memory, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I love sharing my life with her!
• The second “best” thing this year was on Saturday morning. We rode our bikes into the “deep playa”, and checked out the random art installations that were there. There’s stuff out there that you can’t see from far away, but it’s definitely worth the shot journey. It’s far away enough from everything else that you don’t hear the incessant music, which is a welcome change.
  While cruising around, we found plenty of art pieces, ranging from a collection of statues to a huge guitar. We’d ride up to something, check it out, look around aimlessly until we saw that there was something out there, and then do it all over again. It was a very wonderful way to spend a day with Kelly.
  I’d like to share about one of the things we found: a typewriter on a tall desk, with a tall chair. There was roll of paper, and the machine seemed to be in very good working condition.
  I climbed on the chair, and while Kelly took some pictures, I figured that I might as well write something. Without difficulty, a love note was born. When I was done, I handed the note to Kelly. She smiled, and climbed on the tall chair to write a note to me.
  The notes that we wrote to each other will be a good addition to a little scrapbook that Kelly is making, but even if those were lost, I’ll never forget how we spent our time together. The fun, the playfulness and the love are things that I’m grateful for, and they sometimes make me wonder how I ended up being so lucky.
• Sleeping in a tent is nice, even with an air mattress. But it’s not nice enough for Burning Man, when your body needs good rest after battling playa whiteouts, climbing on art pieces and cars, dancing, walking and riding bicycles.
  We’ll try to rent an RV for next year, and hopefully we can share with a couple more people, to lower the cost, and share in the awesomeness of having some more comfortable living quarters.
• I’d never really gone and hung out at Center Camp, but this year we went there a handful of times. We had some iced coffee, and sat around enjoying all that goes on.
  The Center Camp scene is apparently what most people stereotype Burning Man to be: hippies hanging out, people doing Yoga, drum circles, dancing. And in a way, the stereotype is true – but with a twist.
  Most people’s stereotype includes the above mentioned activities, and that’s it. My stereotype goes a bit further, and involves the reason why people are doing such things. So of course it’s true that people are doing all those things that some people label as lame, stupid or childish. Of course they’re doing what they want to do. It’s obvious that all they want to do is enjoy themselves, and that there’s at least one place where they can totally freely do it, and that’s at Burning Man.
  I don’t really want to go deeper into how people could have fun in the “default” world, because that’s not what I’m trying to get to. My point is that I don’t understand the criticism of people doing things that they enjoy.
• I took my Canon 40D camera, and took a few pictures. I didn’t have it on me at all times (in fact, I had it with me very little), but when I did, I think I captured some decent photographs. If you’d like to check them out, head on over to my Flickr.I feel like Burning Man is my yearly test of how my photo skills are doing. It’s a good reference point to look back and compare, and -just like last year- I can say that this year’s pictures are better than last year’s. This is a nice feeling!
• Our “exodus” took us 5 and a half hours, with 2 of them being spent on the exit line from Black Rock City to the highway. We left on Sunday, because we were exhausted and ready to get home to our dreamy bed, and anxious to be able to spend at least one day snuggling in the morning. We got home, enjoyed the wonderful feeling of a hot shower, and went to bed.
• On Monday, Labor Day, we woke up 11 hours after having gone to sleep. And then we spent the rest of the day cleaning up, and enjoying each other. We had no regrets of having left on Sunday and missing the Temple burn.
  Our Burning Man experience ended on a high note. Additionally, we would have been dead to the world for the entire week if we had to do all the cleaning we did on Monday during the week, after very busy and stressful times at work. So busy, in fact, that it’s my excuse for posting this almost a whole week later!

On Thursday, Kelly and I will be going to Burning Man. This will be my third year, and it will be Kelly’s first.

We’ve been getting ready for a while:

• We have scavenged thrift stores and garage sales, ending up with a selection of excellent outfits. Kelly is definitely not going to look like a burning man virgin, and I probably won’t look like a ridiculous mess of unmatched garments once again. I will still look ridiculous, but I think this will be my best looking year yet, because all my clothes go well with each other, and the outrageousness will be of the awesome kind, instead of the “oh, boy” kind.
• There are lists for food, packing supplies, people we definitely must visit and attempt to see, and places or things that we’d like to go see (such as the Raygun Gothic Rocketship and the Bootie mashups party).
• We are actively participating in a registered theme camp, and have been involved in the planning process since day 1. We are part of the Black Rock Center for Unlearning (Washing all that knowledge right out of your brain since 2009).

Our camp’s theme is exactly what I need, because I’m in need for some unlearning. You see, last year’s experience was positive in some ways, but it was overall a negative one. My enjoyment was shadowed by the frustration and disappointment that some of my company brought. There were several times where I just wanted to drive away, and go back to the default world.
These circumstances saddened me, especially when I took into consideration how much effort, time and money I invested, and how little I got in return.

Well, fuck all that!

This year, I’m unlearning all that.

I’m unlearning my self-destructive tendencies of letting people take advantage of me, so I’ve distanced myself from parasitical personalities. I’m unlearning my reluctancy to be impolite, and if someone needs to be told off, flipped off or punched out, I’m ready to do it. Most of all, I’m unlearning to settle, and I’m going for what I want.

Kelly is my partner in crime and my other half. With her hand in mine, I look forward to re-discovering Black Rock City. She’s excited to see the things that everyone talks about, and I’m even more excited to be there to see her jaw drop with every “oooh” inspiring moment that we experience. I know I won’t have to babysit her, and I know that she’ll be genuinely enjoying herself.

That is why this Burning Man should be the best one yet for me. Because Kelly is coming with me. Also, because BRCU is an awesome camp, and the people I’m befriending through it are sincerely good.

This is also why I love that the theme this year is Evolution. I’m saying “fuck what I know” about Burning Man, and ready to know it in a whole different way: with a heart full of love.

After a rather uneventful series of flights, we landed in Mendoza. We walked off the plane (using airstairs) and into the airport, where a small welcoming party patienly awaited for us.

Fresh off the plane, and only a few hours later, my dad prepared a monumental asado to usher us into Argentina. Not only that, but we were joined by both my parents, both brothers and their girlfriends, my grandparents and my aunt. It was quite the committee, and even though I expected it, I think it took Kelly by surprise.

That was only a preview of what the next two weeks would be: an incomparable gastronomical journey, where we ingested food in both great quantity and quality. We had a little bit of everything, but I can’t miss the chance to mention some of my (and now Kelly’s!) favorites: milanesas, empanadas, alfajores and lots of delicious wine.

We visited a lot of people and places, and my mom had planned things for most days, which kept us plenty busy. I’m pretty sure Kelly met 90% of the family, all the way up to my grandmother’s sisters.
It was also gratifying to be able to show Kelly where I grew up. I showed her the schools I went to (and the one that inspired my tattoo), the streets I played in, the buses that I rode around and the places where I used to go.

There were a few memorable events that took place, which I will just itemize for brevity’s sake:

• We spent 4 days in a small apartment in downtown Mendoza. The place was very cold, but having to heat it up with precarious gas heaters was only a fraction of the weirdness.
  It was located right above a parking garage, which got unbearably loud as the business day started at 6am. Car alarms, traffic and people being loud woke us up, and would only let us be half-asleep until we gave up and got up half tired, and full cranky.
• On the first night in Mendoza, and in the apartment, Kelly was woken up at 2 in the morning by a very peculiar sound. There was someone driving down the street, with his music on full blast. Apparently, the car stopped at a red light. And the song that he was having all of the city listen to at this time of night was no other than Coolio’s Gangsta’s Paradise.
  When she told me this the next day, the song was stuck in my head for at least two entire days. Thankfully, we found it hilarious.
• We visited a couple of the finest wineries in Mendoza: Fournier and Salentein. We learned about the wine-making process, we sampled lots of delicious wines, and had a wonderful time with the family.
• On Saturday night, Kelly was brushing her teeth when a hose under the sink busted. Water was spraying everywhere, and the only solution was to shut off the main water line. This meant that we couldn’t flush the toilet or shower.
• On Sunday morning, we woke up and packed our stuff, and moved to a very nice hotel for the rest of our stay. Life was much better 6 stories away from downtown traffic, and with much better heating. As an added bonus, we also had internet access and my iPhone came in very handy to catch up and keep in touch with home.
• Hanging out with some of my old friends was just like time had never passed. We met, we talked, we had fun and we said goodbye in a “I’ll see you tomorrow” kind of vibe.

We spent the last 3 days in the country in Buenos Aires. The weather was perfect for walking around, and we did a lot of that: from the Congress to San Telmo (the Tango district), with stops at the Obelisk and the Pink House. We saw lots of things, and chose to walk because it’s better to be able to hear and breathe a city than to see it pass you by if you chose to ride a taxi from one destination to the other. And it’s also a lot nicer to walk when you have someone’s hand to hold in yours.

One of the reasons why we went to Buenos Aires was to check out a soccer game. And that we did. We stood in a long line, with lots of shady characters, and bought tickets from the nicest scalper in the world. Some teenage punk tried to spit at Kelly as we walked past the security line, and we didn’t really know if we were in the right line… but it all worked out, and we made it inside Boca Juniors‘ stadium. Despite Boca losing the match, we had a great time soaking in the fans’ passion, the songs, the fireworks and the entire experience. We even had a choripán from a street vendor on the way out!

We also spent a day walking around the more centric part of Buenos Aires, and we walked up and down Florida Avenue. We had lunch at my favorite restaurant, Los Inmortales. Oh, and I got a Rhodochrosite ring for Kelly, to mark the occasion of our unforgettable trip to my motherland.

You’re probably wondering where all the pictures are. It was hard for me to chose which pictures to include in my post, since there’s a lot of good ones. Instead, you get to look at all of them by clicking the link:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/nicoyogui/sets/72157620641833613/

And that’s that. Well, not really. There’s a lot to it, but I can’t do it justice without writing something akin to an essay. I can sum it all up by saying that it’s always great to see my family and friends, to be home and eat the stuff I grew up eating. But it’s even better to be able to do it in company of the love of my life.

Hello.

You’ve arrived at my blog, but I’m unfortunately not here at the moment. I am with Kelly and probably my family. We’re probably doing something really fun, getting ready to have some fun, or sleeping it all off.

We will not be back until June 24th. If you need something, please leave a message after the tone, and I’ll get back to you as soon as I can.

Chau!

A 3 day weekend? Why, let’s have a road trip!

But first, let’s spend Saturday hanging out and relaxing, and not getting stuck in traffic with everyone else.

Instead, we left on Sunday. We checked in at the Oakland Marriot at around 2pm, and right away we got in the BART headed to San Francisco. More specifically, to the Haight-Ashbury neighborhood.
We’d eaten a small breakfast, so by the time we made it there, we were ready to sit down and eat. And what better place to do that than Cha Cha Cha! The place was busy, but luckily we got to sit at the bar right away. A pitcher of sangria, and 3 different dishes later (plus an awesome caramel-covered bread pudding for dessert), we were feeling quite good, and more than satisfied. This is definitely a cool place to eat, and the food is delicious.

After eating, we went for a little walk around Golden Gate Park. Unfortunately, the weather wasn’t cooperating, so we didn’t get to enjoy the beautiful gardens as much, but that’s not saying we didn’t have a good time.
We walked through one of the many gardens, took some silly pictures, and headed back to the Haight.

We went into a few of the shops, killed some time and had some fun. Kelly even found something to wear at Burning Man that we could afford -because there are LOTS of things that would be great for Burning Man, but they’re just too expensive.

On Monday, Memorial Day, we headed out to Berkeley. We stumbled for a while looking for a place to eat, and we ended up going into Ann’s Kitchen, which served a glorious American style breakfast, perfect for the occasion.
The weather Gods (or the spirits of all those fallen soldiers) made this day much nicer, which we welcomed as we walked up and down Telegraph street, and checked out the shops and the diverse crowd that was doing the same thing we were.

We also checked out the UC Berkeley campus, where we proceeded to shmoop on the grass by the library. Good times.

With a lot of time to kill, we went on Wikitravel to see what we could do in the area, and that’s how we found out about the Indian Rock Park. Finding it curious enough, we went and checked it out.
Sure enough, it was just a big rock. But lots of people were there, mostly hanging out, and some practicing rock-climbing, some others photographing and at least a couple smoking marihuana.
From the top of the rock you can see most of the Bay. Sadly, it was mostly covered in fog, but despite that, we enjoyed the panoramic view.

However, the main event of our trip was a Flight of the Conchords concert. They toured the US in 2009, and this was their last stop. We HAD to see them, since Kelly and I both enjoy them.
At around 6pm, we sat on the balcony of the Berkeley Community Threatre. The opening act for FotC was Arj Barker, who played Dave in their HBO series. Little did we know that he’s a stand up comedian, and his routine was a great ice-breaker for what was to come. His style was sometimes very close to Dane Cook, but that’s alright by me, since it makes me laugh.

But then, it actually happened. Lights went dim. And …

Of course, that video is not from the same performance that we saw, but it was similar, and set the tone for what was to come: over an hour of silly songs, and the goofy kind of humor that only New Zealand’s fourth most popular digi-folk paradists provides.
There were lots of laughs, some songs I’d never head before, and a lot of singing along with Bret and Jemaine. It was a great live show, and some of the antics that they put on onstage were worth the ticket and the traveling.

To sum it up, we had a great time, and it was a weekend that won’t be forgotten. Or, to use the vernacular, an EPIC WEEKEND.

Monday, April 13th: After getting up at 8am, and going to get a car window replaced, we were ready to get on the road by 11am.
It took us about 9 hours to go from Reno to Huntington Beach. We took US 395 all the way south, and then went from there.
We arrived at the house of Kelly’s aunt and uncle, Ginny and Gary. They welcomed us and fed us leftover Easter dinner (which we missed thanks to the car theft that delayed us by a day and a half). We talked, and went to sleep to recover from the long trip… and be ready for the next day!

Tuesday: I hadn’t gotten much sleep. It was hot, humid and I guess I still had a bit of anxiety about the burglary. It also didn’t help that I woke up at around 8, ready to go… because we were going to Disneyland!
The lack of sleep didn’t get in the way though, because as soon as we set step upon the happiest place on earth, I was too excited to be tired.
Kelly had promised to buy me a Mickey hat and a churro as soon as we walked in the park, and that was exactly what happened.
It was my first time in Disneyland, and I was enjoying every minute of it. Everyone was so happy!
My first ride ever was Star Tours. It was a great start to the day, and my experience: old-school, classic, fun and silly.
From there, my memory gets blurry in a haze of laughs, rides, cartoon characters and feelings of happiness.
My favorite parts were the rides that involved movement, screaming and laughs: Screamin’ (in California Adventure), Big Thunder, Indiana Jones Adventure and Space Mountain (Kelly’s favorite ride!). I also really enjoyed Toon Town, because it really made me feel like I was in a cartoon, and it was just so goofy and happy!
Kelly and I also enjoyed observing all the park-goers, specially the little ones. Early in the day, most kids were litteraly bouncing up and down, running around as the excitement overwhelmed them. But later in the afternoon, the sight was quite different: temper tantrums, kids crying and our favorite: just passed out, so tired that they couldn’t even stay awake, and crashed on a bench somewhere.

Wednesday was a much more laid back day. We slept in for the first time since Sunday, which we deserved since we were on vacation after all.
The plans for the day were quite simple: go visit some relatives. And that’s how I ended up hanging out with Kelly and her grandpa for about 3 hours. Propitiously, he had a large stack of old pictures, and it was very enjoyable to see pictures of Kelly when she was a young one.
On the way back, we drove a little bit of the Pacific Coast Highway, from Orange County to Huntington Beach. The scenery was beautiful, and we both longed to go hang out at the beach, which we would soon do.
For dinner, we met up with Kelly’s cousin Gillian, her husband Dave and their 3 kids, at their house. We had pizza, some beer, and chatted for a good while. It was very laid back, relaxing and enjoyable.

On Thursday, we had major plans. In the morning, we traveled across LA, through some really shitty traffic, to arrive at the gorgeous Getty Center. We spent a few hours there. Kelly gave me a private history lesson about art and the Renaissance, and we enjoyed the sun and warm weather in the beautiful gardens.
While at the Getty, I couldn’t help but think of my parents, who would love the architecture of the place (my mom is an architect, my dad a civil engineer). It also was when I was hurt the most about not having my camera, because I really wanted to take some pretty pictures.

Afraid of what getting back on a freeway -at rush hour- would do for my mental sanity, we decided to take an alternative route to our next destination. Kelly’s excellent navigational skills determined that we could take Sunset Boulevard, so we did just that. It was another great drive!
We went from the Getty, through Bel-Air and Beverly Hills, seeing incredible houses mansions and fancy cars, and into Hollywood and LA, where the feeling was not quite the same, and we got to see a bit more of the “west side” feel.

Anyway, our final destination for the evening was the LA Dodger’s stadium. It was time for another First Ever for me! I’d never been to a baseball game, and this was the perfect opportunity to cross that out of my list.
It was awesome! There were a lot of people, and we got some pretty good seats, so we were able to even see the ball as it got pitched and swung at.
In an attempt to get the real experience, we got hot-dogs and beer. I wasn’t quite ready for the wallet shock that this was going to be: three hot dogs at $5 each, and four beers at $10 each. An expense of $55 for something that was really worth less than $20. Oh well. Had to do it at least once.
The game was entertaining, and we got to learn about the Dodger’s fans and their passion for Manny. The other team was the S.F. Giants… and I could have probably pitched for them and gotten away with it, because they were horrible at it.
The Dodgers won, and that sealed my first official baseball experience as a very positive one.

After such a long day, Friday was time to finally go to Huntington Beach, aka SurfCity USA. The temperature wasn’t very hot, so we laid out on the sand to enjoy the sun, and watched some surfers do their thing.
Before we knew it, a couple of hours had gone by, and we were getting cooked. We decided to take a break, go have dinner with Kelly’s aunt and uncle, and to come back to watch the sunset.

So nice! A cool breeze blew as we sat on the sand and saw the sun slowly disappear. It was very romantic, and I hope we can do it again on beaches all over the world.

On Saturday, we did it all over again. Beach, sun, relax. I even got in the water and went for a very short swim, since the water temperature was of only 58 degrees.
The day ended with a big birthday party for Gary, with all of Kelly’s relatives that live in the area. It was fun to be in such a big family setting, with the kids being noisy playing, and everyone chatting it up. I think I did an ok impression on everyone, other than the couple of times when I called someone by someone else’s name. Oops.

Sunday was the sad day of traveling back to Reno, but it had to be done. We decided to just come up the same roads that took us down there.
We stopped in Mammoth to visit the Coach Outlet store, and found Kelly a replacement wallet for the one that had been stolen from her. We saved about 60% by shopping at the outlet! And by we, I mean me, because it was Kelly’s advance birthday present. Win-win, all the way.

The trip ended on a very high note when I got a phone call from someone that had found Kelly’s purse in their garbage can. The irreplaceable bag from Fiji was safe, and saved! The rest of the items were not there, but the most important one was the bag, and that made us happy to be back home.

It was a very long one week, and an excellent vacation. Kelly was an excellent tour guide, and it was a great road trip from beginning to end. We drove a little bit over 1300 miles total, and we were apart only when the other one was using the bathroom. Oh yeah!

Even though I didn’t have my camera, we had Kelly’s. We took a few pictures, and you can see all of them on my flickr page. I leave you with a link to that: http://www.flickr.com/photos/nicoyogui/sets/72157616981363233/

Things are happenin’!

Earlier today, I called the USCIS (ex INS) to check up on the status of my Visa. I wanted to make sure that after my upcoming trip to Argentina with Kelly, I could re-enter without much trouble.
Turns out the answer was a big fat no.

And that I have to leave the United States within 30 days.

Unless…

This is where the “welp” part kicks in. You see, Kelly and I have been going pretty solid for the last 4 months. We’ve talked about raising a family, having a white picket fenced house, going on a Cruise in the Mediterranean and all that jazz…
And given the circumstances, we’re going to elope.

That’s right, ladies and gentlemen. It’s happening a little sooner than planned and/or expected, but it was going to happen sooner or later… and sooner it is!
Kelly is the woman of my dreams, and makes me feel like no one ever has. She’s been incredibly understanding about these shenanigans, and as soon as I kneeled to ask for her hand, I already knew she was going to say yes. I have no doubts that we’ll make it, and this might just be a blessing in disguise!

We’re looking for a place to make it all happen, soon. Probably nothing big, just friends and close family. It has to happen probably in less than 2 weeks, so that afterwards I still have time to clear all the paperwork and go through all the red tape.

You want to give the newlyweds a present? Just head on over to PayPal and help out with a few dollars!

  
Cerro De La Gloria, originally uploaded by . JoNiuX .

Yesterday, Kelly and I reserved our plane tickets to go to my hometown, Mendoza. We will be arriving on June 10^th, and we’ll stay in Argentina for a whole two weeks. I’m already way excited about it!
The plans include seeing the family, showing Kelly around the places where I grew up, and eating a lot of delicious food. Of course we’ll do a few touristy things, which most definitely will involve several wine-tastings in many of Mendoza’s awesome wineries. 

Our flight back will leave from Buenos Aires on June ^23rd. We are planning on heading over to the Paris of South America a few days early, and spend time walking around and checking things out.

I’ve started to teach Kelly some localized Spanish. She already refers to Argentines as boludos. I think it’s a step in the right direction.

Just to continue the ongoing theme, I figured I´d post a happier update about my trip.
I´ve made it home safely, and I am right now sitting in the living room of the house I grew up in. It´s nice to be home!

I had a nice reception at the Mendoza airport. My mom was there, with my 2 brothers, my grandparents and aunt on my mom´s side, and my other grandma and my godmother-aunt from San Juan. The weather also welcomed me with a lovely 35 °C, which translates to around 95 °F.
We came to the house and had some lunch, and what better way to start than with some home made tartas, which would be something like a quiche; not to mention the dessert: ambrosia - a family recipe of a dessert that can cure cancer. That´s right, it´s that awesome.

Right now I´m about to go take a nap. A lot of sleeping for short periods of time and seating down was ok, but I long for a real bed and the lack of interruptions. Stay tuned for more, although the updates won´t be coming as often while I´m here having a good ole time.

:ninja: This post does not exist.

Anyway, an old friend from High School in Argentina contacted me a while back to see if I could get him a MacBook laptop. Apparently, back there, after taxes, importation fees and a lot of bullshit, they end up costing about $3000, as opposed to the $1400 that they cost here. So, we talked about it for a bit, and we devised a plan.

Using Moneygram, he wired me the $1400 needed. I picked them up, which was pretty straight-forward and easy, and with fourteen Benjamin Franklins (or, one hundred and forty :tenbux: ) I headed down to the nearest Apple store, which happens to be in the Summit Sierra, the mall way South of Reno.
The purchase was very easy, and five minutes later, I had a fancy box with a brand new shiny laptop.

I’ve been using the MacBook, as agreed with my friend. I’ve loaded pictures, movies, games and applications. I’m going to make it look like I use it all the time… so that when I go through customs, I can write it off as it being mine, and not as something I’m importing. That way, I’m saving him a lot of money, and I’m sticking it to the man.

I hope I don’t go to jail!